In a stunning move this morning, the President of the United States of America, Barack Hussein Obama was taken into custody by a platoon of army soldiers lead by Brigadier General Clyde De'Sarae.
Just after 10:10 a.m. Eastern time, the platoon raided the White House quickly sweeping into the Oval Office taking President Obama into custody.
General De'Sarae released the following statement to the not oft-read internet blog The Answers:
"During a late night Pentagon meeting, it was decided that signing into law a bill that negated rights guaranteed to American Citizens by the Bill of Rights was an act of terrorism and an attack on the Constitution of the United States of America.
Having sworn to protect the constitution from enemies foreign and domestic, I was very pleased to be selected to lead this operation. Thanks to the powers granted us by the new law, President Obama will be detained indefinitely with whatever access to legal counsel the Military Tribunal deems appropriate. My recommendation to the Tribunal will be zero access to legal counsel, as the president of a country betraying said country is completely inexcusable.
With any luck, I will be granted the privilege of interrogating the terrorist suspect personally. (shouts to nearby soldier) Hey, Lt. O'bvious, what equipment do we need to do a waterboarding again?
DISCLAIMER: This news is only as good as it's source, and it's quite possible General De'Sarae is a figment of this journalist's imagination.